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 Hiryu

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PostSubject: Hiryu   Sat Jul 14, 2012 1:46 pm

~Character Information~
Name: Hiryu Zaraki
Nickname/Alias:
Gender: Male
Height: 6ft 4 in
Weight: 256
Age: actual: 1024,appearance: 24

Appearance:
Spoiler:
 

Clothing:sleeveless shihakushō

Personality:Don't care attitude. He only cares about fighting and getting stronger, oh and sake.

~Abilities and Skills~
Speciality:
Hakuda master: In the soul society he is one of the best hand to hand combatant. He can fight many opponents with his zanpakuto sheathed, as a matter of fact that is exactly how he stats off his fights. Also when he finds and opponent who can push him to his limit he immedatelly reverts to using Kemono mōdo: Ikari no monsutā.

Hoho master: As one of the master users of shunpo he can cover a diameter of 8 miles with one step. He can appear behind an enemy and surprise even his captain. He can even increase his speed by using a technique he created Supīdo-kyō: Saisho no ippo.

Weapons master: He is very versatile with and weapon he can find. He can switch from an axe to a stick to a sword and still win a fight. His main weapon though is his zanpakuto. He carries nodachi on his back and a pack of shurikens on his side. He also has carries a tanto which he hides in the right cheast side of his shihakushō.

Abilities:
Supīdo-kyō: Saisho no ippo(speed demon: first step)His own move he created, speed increases and he can create 4 tangible clones

Kemono mōdo: Ikari no monsutā(beast mode: rage monster)A move that is activated when pushed to his limit his strength is increased by 4 and his senses are heightened

Spiritual energy: Since he has been alive for over 1000 years he has a lot of spiritual energy. It can get so high that he can paralyze 4th seats and lower. Compared to other lieutenants his spiritual energy is monsterous and because he wears seals he puts pressure on himself when fighting stronger opponents.

Endurance and Durability: He can fight for long periods of time without showing signs of fatigue. Also he can take as much pain as to be stabbed serveral hundred times and not even let go a wimmper. He can be thrown through several buildings and just say a half hearted "ow". Though he hates it when he jamms his finger. Damn it! Why the hell is it always the little one....

Senkaimon: He can open a dark purple senkaimon to the world of the living and the soul society.

Offense (100)
Defense (80)
Mobility (100)
Reiatsu(100)
Intelligence (60)
Physical Strength (100)
Total: 540/600

  • Weaknesses

Has no abilities in kido.

Rank: squad 11 lieutenant


~Character History~
Before Death Arc:
Spoiler:
 

After Death Arc
Spoiler:
 


Shinigami Arc
Spoiler:
 

RP Sample
Spoiler:
 

~Visored Information~

Mask Appearance:

First Mask:
Spoiler:
 

Second Mask:
Spoiler:
 

Mask Duration: 8 post

Additional Abilities: these are generally to increase aspects of your shinigami abilities so let us know what abilities are increased. A maximum of 2 abilities can be increased

Hollow Abilities:

cero, la manipulación(zero manipulation): He can form a red cero (weak) or a black cero (strong) and punch or kick with it around a fist or leg. Also he can combine the red and black cero to create a cero twice the size and double the power.

muertes miasmas(deaths miasma): It is a poision that is forcefully released in to air when he roars. It causes paralysis and skin deterioration. The only antidote kept on him and is delivered with an eye dropper because of potency.

Garganta: (No explanations required)

Strengths:

Augmented spiritual energy. When his mask is activated his spiritual energy is increased by 4.

Enhanced speed: his already impressive speed gets a boost. ahe is now able to create 8 clones when it is added to his Supīdo-kyō: Saisho no ippo.

Enhanced strength: His already brutish strength also gets increased. He is able to use high level moves such as ikkotsu and sokotsu.

Weaknesses:
Can only use red ceros 8 times in a match, black ceros 4 times and the combination 2 times in a match.

Garganta can't be connected to the soul society.

Muertes miasmas leaves him both physically and spiritually drained. It takes 2 battles to recover and use a again.

Muertes miasmas can only be used 4 times per battle.

Inner hollow
Appearance:
Spoiler:
 
Personality: Very demented and loves to devour souls. If he had a ipod he would put sounds of people screaming.

Completo!!


Last edited by Hiryū on Tue Jul 24, 2012 3:35 am; edited 19 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Sun Jul 15, 2012 1:55 am

Pretty sure Vizards aren't allowed to hold positions in the Gotei 13.
You might want to send mage a pm though as I'm not sure if he will allow it as a special case.

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Sun Jul 15, 2012 2:32 am

I had a talk with Riox and i wont be a vizard yet but later on in the story i will be changed
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Sun Jul 15, 2012 2:46 am

Ahh okay just needed clarification aside from that I hope to see the finished product ^^.

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:15 am

sure will
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Sun Jul 15, 2012 11:32 am

Ill slap an approval on this Very Happy

one thing. could ya resize the signature Shocked

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:02 am

yeah will do
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Thu Jul 19, 2012 3:14 am

:scock: omg love it

anyways if app is done...
Ill put ya in the shinigami group untill such times as you go all vizard Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Thu Jul 19, 2012 12:29 pm

*bows* Thnx monami ans app is almost complete just to add finishing touches
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Sat Jul 21, 2012 1:25 pm

Hiryu your using the Zan spirit application for your Zanpakutou there is a separate one for regular Zanpakutou.Dunno if you knew or not just point it out.

which is this

Code:
    [size=18][b]~Zanpakuto Information~[/b][/size]

    [b]Name:[/b] Japanese (English Translation)
    [b]Appearance:[/b]
    [b]Type:[/b] Elemental, Combo, Healing, etc

    [size=18][b]~Shikai Information~[/b][/size]
    [b]Appearance[/b]
    [b]Abilities:[/b]
    [list][*]Passive:[/list]
    [list][*]Active:[/list]
    [u]Ability Name:[/u]
    [u]Type:[/u]
    [u]Range:[/u]
    [u]Duration:[/u]


    [size=18][b]~Bankai Information~[/b][/size]
    [b]Appearance[/b]
    [b]Abilities:[/b]
    [list][*]Passive:[/list]
    [list][*]Active:[/list]
    [u]Ability Name:[/u]
    [u]Type:[/u]
    [u]Range:[/u]
    [u]Duration:[/u]

    [size=18][b]~Spirit Information~[/b][/size]
    [b]Appearance:[/b]
    [b]Personality:[/b]
    [b]Inner World:[/b]


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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 24, 2012 6:55 am

~Zanpakuto Information~

Name: Shisha no batsu (punishment of the dead)
Appearance:
Spoiler:
 
Type: Melee

~Shikai Information~
Appearance
Spoiler:
 
Release and Name Kyōfu to korosu,Shisha no batsu (Terrorize and kill ,Punishment of the dead)
Abilities:
  • Passive:

Shisha e no omāju (Tribute to the dead)
  • Active:

Jinsokuna shi (Swift death)

Ability Name: Jinsokuna shi (swift death)
Type: Attack
Range: Mid-range, Close range
Duration: Until shikai is canceled
Description It is a move that shoots a quickly condensed amount of spiritual energy at his opponent. It moves at the speed of sound.

Ability Name: Shisha e no omāju (Tribute to the dead)
Type: Support
Range: Self
Duration: Until shikai is canceled
Description For every 16 hollows he kills his power is increased by %.5.

~Bankai Information~
Appearance
Spoiler:
 

Bankai name: Shisha eien jigoku magatta batsu (Eternal hell bent punishment of the dead)

Special
Armor:
Spoiler:
 
Abilities:
  • Passive:

Shisha no yoroi( Armor of the dead)
Shisha e no omāju (Tribute to the dead)

  • Active:

Jinsokuna shi (Swift death)
Shisha no sutoraiku (Strike of the dead)

Ability Name: Shisha no yoroi( Armor of the dead)
Type: Protection
Range: Self
Duration: Until bankai is canceled
Description A spectral armor is formed around him. Every other post he regains %.8 of his strength.

Ability Name:Shisha e no omāju (Tribute to the dead)
Type: Support
Range: Self
Duration: Until bankai is canceled
Description For every 16 hollows he kills his power is increased by %1.

Ability Name: Jinsokuna shi (swift death)
Type: Attack
Range: Mid-range, Close range
Duration: Until bankai is canceled
Description It is a move that shoots a quickly condensed amount of spiritual energy at his opponent. It moves at the speed of light.

Ability Name: Shisha no sutoraiku (Strike of the dead)
Type: Attack
Range: All ranges
Duration: 4 post per battle
Description He can create a bone hand that grabs his opponent. It then drags his opponent and holds he/she. The higher the spiritual energy the less time it can hold onto the opponent.

~Spirit Information~
Appearance:
Spoiler:
 
Personality:Dark and depressed
Inner World:
Spoiler:
 


Last edited by Hiryū on Tue Jul 24, 2012 2:01 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 24, 2012 7:59 am

Shocked your spirit is my bankai Shocked

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 24, 2012 1:47 pm

So... I gotta change it Question scratch
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 24, 2012 2:12 pm

Alright. Time to be the terrible bad guy (since you're colored I'm going to assume this is all done...Despite the fact that a second staff member never looked this over...)

Hiryu wrote:
Hakuda master: In the soul society he is one of the best hand to hand combatant. He can fight many opponents with his zanpakuto sheathed, as a matter of fact that is exactly how he stats off his fights. Also when he finds and opponent who can push him to his limit he immedatelly reverts to using Kemono mōdo: Ikari no monsutā.
Pretty sure this alone would make him a 2nd Division guy and not 11th since they don't really rely on Hakuda...But I'll let it slide, however being one of the best and being in the 11th is going to be a no for me, since that would most certainly be something belonging to a 2nd Division member considering they spend most of their time training in Hakuda...Plus being consider "master" level is highly unlikely. Even the most skilled Lt. in Hakuda is only an Expert level.

Hoho master: As one of the master users of shunpo he can cover a diameter of 8 miles with one step. He can appear behind an enemy and surprise even his captain. He can even increase his speed by using a technique he created Supīdo-kyō: Saisho no ippo.
Same thing as before. Also, being a Master in this area as a Lt. is not likely unless in the 2nd Division for the same reason as Hakuda. The 11th Division doesn't train in Hakuda and Hoho as much as they do in Zanjutsu. It really sounds like you should probably consider switching divisions. Just saying.

Weapons master: He is very versatile with and weapon he can find. He can switch from an axe to a stick to a sword and still win a fight. His main weapon though is his zanpakuto. He carries nodachi on his back and a pack of shurikens on his side. He also has carries a tanto which he hides in the right cheast side of his shihakushō.

----------------------------------

1 mask, not two. I can understand why there is two, but just limit it to one por favor.

----------------------------------

Hiryu wrote:
Spiritual energy: Since he has been alive for over 1000 years he has a lot of spiritual energy. It can get so high that he can paralyze 4th seats and lower. Compared to other lieutenants his spiritual energy is monsterous and because he wears seals he puts pressure on himself when fighting stronger opponents.

I'm not crazy about the parts in red. Honestly, I think this entire thing is a WAY too much for a lieutenant. This sounds more like a captain thing to me, and there are plenty of captain spots open...


-----------------------------

I would like to see more weaknesses there. You have basically built up a character who is designed to be (what seems) a challenge foe, but I see no weakness. He can't use kido? That's not a weakness, that's just a small annoyance really...


------------------------------------

Hiryu wrote:
cero, la manipulación(zero manipulation): He can form a red cero (weak) or a black cero (strong) and punch or kick with it around a fist or leg. Also he can combine the red and black cero to create a cero twice the size and double the power.

I fail to see what the purpose of a red and black cero are. You can control the strength of your cero anyway, so saying that one is weak and the other is strong isn't very helpful. If there is a significant difference between them then please go into detail with what it is, but otherwise just make it all one color.

muertes miasmas(deaths miasma): It is a poision that is forcefully released in to air when he roars. It causes paralysis and skin deterioration. The only antidote kept on him and is delivered with an eye dropper because of potency.
I would prefer if you could find a way to make this...not air born. Really the only person here who could probably withstand it is Canaan, and that's just because he's the air basically...

Garganta: (No explanations required)

Strengths:

Augmented spiritual energy. When his mask is activated his spiritual energy is increased by 4.

Enhanced speed: his already impressive speed gets a boost. ahe is now able to create 8 clones when it is added to his Supīdo-kyō: Saisho no ippo.
Clones can only go up to 5 max.

Enhanced strength: His already brutish strength also gets increased. He is able to use high level moves such as ikkotsu and sokotsu.


-------------------------------------

Hiryu wrote:
Ability Name: Shisha no yoroi( Armor of the dead)
Type: Protection
Range: Self
Duration: Until bankai is canceled
Description A spectral armor is formed around him. Every other post he regains %.8 of his strength.

How much of a beating can this armor take?



Ability Name: Shisha no sutoraiku (Strike of the dead)
Type: Attack
Range: All ranges
Duration: 4 post per battle
Description He can create a bone hand that grabs his opponent. It then drags his opponent and holds he/she. The higher the spiritual energy the less time it can hold onto the opponent.
Please post durations for how long people can be held.

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 24, 2012 3:18 pm

Your mastery of weapons is less that of Zanjutsu and more a general weapons master. Zanjutsu means a master of using their Zanpakutou that wouldn't necessarily translate to any weapon.

I have to agree with the points Valintine points out. Also being a lieutenant its unlikely he would be able to move fast enough to create clones.Since that is a captain level ability known mostly only within the 2nd division.

Also a addition to Valintine's ruling regarding Kido for that to be a effective weakness the character in question can not just be unable to use it but so bad at it that using it would kill them.

Also your pre-death history should be set sometime during the showa period things such as schools didn't really exist back then. As the only people taught formally where samurai, nobles and the Emperor.

In the shinigami arc There isn't a need to post the turning into a Vizard if it hasn't happened yet roleplay it out on the site. Otherwise putting it in throws your history out of whack and means the idea you have planned wouldn't really work as all the captains would notice the change in body language especially your captain much less any odd behavior that was odder than normal.

That is the only major stuff I can see that Valintine hasn't covered.

Also to probably get the use of master Hakuda your character would have to be a absolute warrior among squad 11, Meaning your character would have to be written all the way from ground up as a warrior and a soldier from human life all the way to now. The only example for that type of character is Ito Sengo, who is dead currently with a plot concept still swirling in my skull for his return as a unstoppable monster.


Last edited by Sengo on Tue Jul 24, 2012 3:48 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Jul 24, 2012 3:28 pm

Let me rephrase that:


I will NOT allow a Lieutenant Hakuda MASTER who is not in the Onmitsukido...period. I don't care about your background or where you're going with the character...It's not happening.


Also, you could still create clones. Pretty sure at least one of the Lieutenants has done it...

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Wed Jul 25, 2012 12:49 pm

Maximum of 5 clones can be made due to a characters abilities

as for the Hakuda
might i suggest a variation on it that is more compatiable with squad 11. The master class in this area of expertise is reserved for squad 2
Maybe power rather than speed *shrugs* that is my sugestion for this ability anyways Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Hiryu   Tue Sep 11, 2012 9:58 am

Due to lack of progress and activity


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